Suggested Interview Questions for Susan Ligon

Creator of I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister

Q. When your first child was born, you’ve said you entered the “mommy zone” with your “eyes wide shut.” What do you mean by that? Do you think other parents can relate to that experience?

A. I entered motherhood with great joy and anticipation, but without a very realistic picture of the world-bending change that was before me. For me, the transition may have been magnified, as I was 33, had a well-developed career and many established patterns. (That’s code for “I was set in my ways.”) But I think, for all moms, the process of birthing and bringing home that first baby is life changing. There are joys that were previously unknown, challenges we could not have imagined and hilarity that no sit-com could rival.

A. You and your husband have two sons. How did a second child entering the picture affect your family?

Q. Our sons are 23 months apart so our first-born, Daniel, was still very much a toddler when we told him about the new little one. Daniel watched my expanding tummy with wonder and excitement, bestowing showers of kisses on “My Baby.” This affectionate term for his baby brother stuck and was Daniel’s preferred moniker for his brother until Andrew was a year old. We loved it because it expressed a connection between the boys that we were trying to foster.

A. It seems that bookstore shelves are filled with parenting and baby books. Were you surprised at how difficult it was to find resources especially designed for the older sibling? What made you decide to address this product need?
It was surprising to me that so few products seemed to reach out directly to the new big brother or sister. After all, for many children, becoming a big brother or sister is the first paradigm shift of their short lives. Mommy and Daddy’s attention expands in a new direction, and there is a new human being in the house, and apparently to stay. The magnitude of this transition, along with one way to creatively address it, became clear one afternoon as I was working on Andrew’s baby book. Daniel sidled up to me and said, “Mommy, I want a book like ‘My Baby’s’.” “Wouldn’t it be great,” I thought, “if there was an interactive book for new siblings that would record their thoughts and feelings about the new baby as well as their most important accomplishments at that time?” And that was the beginning of the I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister books.

Q. Many parents want to see their children enjoy each other as friends – not just as siblings and rivals. How can I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister books help parents reach that goal?

A. The foundations of friendship are simple—acceptance, valuing of one another, connection and lots of love. I believe the Big Brother/Big Sister books promote these relational building blocks from the very beginning. Each fun-filled page helps the big brother or sister understand how special their role is in the life of the new baby and the whole family. It also provides opportunities to record special memories, current developmental milestones in the life of the big brother or sister and first feelings about the baby. And while the focus of the book is very positive, it does allow and encourage the older sibling to express some of the very normal feelings they may not be as comfortable talking about—such as jealousy, resentment and loss.

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Ligon Q&A, page two

Q. I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister are filled with colorful illustrations and space for drawing and writing. Why the interactive pages instead of a storybook? Which interactive activities have been your children’s favorites?

A. Children are concrete, therefore it’s helpful to have a colorful, fun and concrete tool that helps them process this new relationship. The books provide plenty of space for drawing pictures of baby and big brother or sister, photographs and fill-in-the-blank questions designed to capture special moments. My boys especially love the sections on First Words and Steps where we remember and record both Daniel and Andrew’s “Da Da” and baby steps. They also love the My Pets pages that provide an opportunity to talk about their frogs and fish, as well as favorite stuffed animal friends.

Q. I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister books seem like they could serve as a springboard for family discussion about the arrival of a new little one. What are some other practical ideas for preparing siblings for a new baby?

1. The first step is to prepare yourself! Get as much rest as possible before the baby is born. Try to have all of your baby supplies in order – enough to last the first few weeks. And try to prepare some extra meals in advance for those inevitable days when dinner just isn’t happening.

2. Involve your older child in some of the preparation – let them pick out a few new clothes and toys as well as pulling out their own baby things that they now get to share with baby.

3. Help them select a gift to give to the new baby, and likewise, choose a gift for the new baby to give their awesome big brother or sister.

4. Paint a “Welcome Home, Baby!” banner together in the days preceding the birth. When baby comes home, lavish lots of reassuring love and kisses on the new older sibling. Give the older sibling a disposable camera so they can take a few of their own pictures of the new arrival.

5. And give yourself and your older child plenty of time and patience as you make the transition. You’re helping to build a lifelong friendship and all of your prayers, preparation and hard work will reap great rewards in time.

Q. Your books are available not only in bookstores, but also in many maternity shops and hospital gift stores. Do you see these books as “sibling gifts” for those making visits to newborns at the hospital? Did you create the books with that purpose in mind?

A. I do believe these books make wonderful “sibling gifts” that are both entertaining and meaningful. For some time now, the trend has been to bring a gift to the new big brother or sister at the same time a baby gift is given. This helps to communicate how special both the baby and older sibling are—and helps include the big brother or sister at a time when the loss of attention is felt most acutely. There are few products in the marketplace targeted at this need, and I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister help fill that void.

Q. There are multiple licensing companies interested in the I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister books. Can you tell us what new Big Brother/Big Sister products we might see next?

A. Right now we’re looking at a full line of apparel using the art, both for the big brother or sister and for the new baby. There is also the possibility of a music project with sing-a-long songs about becoming a big brother or sister. We’ll also have fun buttons and stickers that help celebrate this very important role.

March 2002