There’s a New Baby at My House!

Although it is normal for siblings to feel jealousy towards a new baby, there are some steps parents can take to help prepare siblings for the arrival of a new baby. A little preparation and forethought can prevent a lot of frustration and rivalry later!

Tips for Preparing a Sibling for a New Baby

· Tell older siblings about the new baby only when mom begins to show (9 months is a long time to wait—ask any expectant mom!). But make sure they get the news from you; this isn’t the kind of surprise they need to receive from friends or neighbors.

· Give the siblings age-appropriate information about the baby’s growth and development—and keep information consistent with the sibling’s interest level. Some kids will have lots of questions; others will be bored with the entire discussion.

· Don’t make the pregnancy the focus of family life. Stay involved in siblings’ activities and schedules as much as possible.

· You may wish to take older siblings on a tour of the hospital’s maternity area. This may put the child more at ease when visiting baby and mom at the hospital, especially if a sibling has some anxiety about hospitals in general.

· Allow siblings to come to a prenatal doctor visit and listen to the baby’s heartbeat

· Share specific details about life with a young baby (crying, sleeping, demands on parents) to help the siblings prepare for changes.

· Check your local hospitals for sibling classes, which feature age-appropriate discussions about adding a new baby to the family.

· Involve siblings in the new baby preparations. Let them help pick out clothing and other newborn supplies.

· Try not to change the other children’s routines too much near the arrival of the new baby. Routine and predictability will give siblings a sense of comfort as the new baby brings change.

· Call your other children frequently while you are at the hospital. If it is not possible for them to visit you and baby at the hospital, send pictures and notes to them instead.

· Consider having the new baby give a gift to the older sibling when the meet for the first time. (May we suggest I’m the Big Brother and I’m the Big Sister interactive books?)

· Review baby pictures of the older siblings to remind them that there were cared for in the same way as the new baby.

· Plan one-on-one time with older siblings after baby arrives home. Make sure each child receives a dose of individual attention from you each week.

· Allow older siblings to be involved in baby’s care as much as their age and interest allow.

· Let the siblings know that it is okay to have lots of different feelings about the baby (love, resentment, jealousy, pride). Encourage them to talk about how they feel.

And just in case you wondered: Tips for Preparing a Pet for a New Baby

· Make sure your pet’s vaccinations are current by taking the pet in for a full exam before baby arrives. Also make sure any problems with fleas or ticks are under control.

· If possible, allow your pet to spend time with another young child before yours is born.

· If at all possible, make sure your dog knows basic commands such as sit, stay and come—before baby arrives.

· Before baby arrives home, send a blanket or other clothing item home for pet to sniff.

· Consider having someone other than the pet’s primary caregiver hold the baby when the little one comes in the door.

· When you arrive home, spend a few minutes alone with the pet to assure it of your love. Don’t forget to make time to play with Fido every day—even though your days and nights may feel busier than ever.